It’s no secret that social media has taken over the lives of many people. Everywhere you look, students (and adults!) are glued to their screens, “doom scrolling”, and increasingly disconnected from the real world around them. When social media was taking off in the late 2000s, it was promoted as a way for people to connect with one another. Two decades later, this has proved to not just be an empty promise, but a bait and switch. While these negative effects are wide-reaching, they are most notably evident in students who are still developing socially, emotionally, and spiritually.

While there is a wide array of research being done on the effects of social media on teens and mental health, this post is not meant to add to or even report on that. If you are looking for something in that vein, I highly recommend The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. Instead, I want to share a few reflections emerging from my observations working directly with students

1. Distraction

I put this one first because it is the most obvious to those on the outside looking in. That is… if there were anyone on the outside looking in. To be honest, most people are on the inside, aware of the constant distraction and hoping to find a way out. And this is exactly what social media companies want. They make money off of our attention, so the more of it they can get, the more profitable their business. As the saying goes, “If something is free, YOU are the product.”

Most people go to social media for connection (hence the term “social” media) and instead, they get constant noise, distraction, and mental clutter. Teenagers are especially susceptible to this as their attention spans are still developing and the endless scroll of social media and its incessant notifications makes it even harder for them to focus on anything for longer than a few minutes at most. Instead of filling their minds with things that are true, honorable, and lovely (Philippians 4:8), they are bombarded with fleeting entertainment, arguments, and worldly influences that often pull them away from the most important things. Social Media created the soundbite culture we live in where few have the sustained attention necessary for interacting deeply with anything true, good, and beautiful.

2. Drama

This is one that bubbles over into my world on an almost weekly basis. The digital connections students make are a shallow representation of the embodied relationships were were designed for. As young people are– again– still developing their interpersonal skills, they lack the emotional intelligence necessary to sustain deep relationships that we all long for. Social media replaces deep relationships with shallow interactions—likes, comments, and quick messages that don’t foster true connection. The end result is that students say things digitally they would never say to a person’s face, or they fail to realize that a digital comment intended to be shared privately will be passed around to others. Hurt feelings and retaliation ensue all because of the illusion of safety created by the screen.

In my interactions over the years I have had to remind students countless times that “For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases.” (Proverbs 26:20) as well as that “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs. 12:18) No, social media did not create the drama we see in the lives of students today, but it has enabled students access to more fuel than ever to throw on the fire before they have gained the maturity to know better.

3. Danger

Sadly, this is the most insidious of all. Again, students go to social media to connect with their friends but find themselves enslaved to the algorithm. Remember, the social media giants are selling your attention, so they want to serve you those posts that will keep your attention the longest. These algorithms have been fine-tuned over the years to a frightening degree. But it is not funny cat videos that people are drawn to. It is the depravity of our sin nature that quickly surfaces. As one example, the NY Times reported that within 30 minutes of signing up for TikTok, a 13-year-old girl was being shown videos promoting eating disorders.

These are the dangers that lurk on social media. There is no earthly reason for a 13-year-old to be shown this content, and social media companies make it nearly impossible for parents to restrict access to these types of posts. The best answer to protecting students from these dangers is simple– stay away.

If you want to understand more about how social media is affecting teenagers, I highly recommend The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. His research lays out the real dangers and challenges of the digital world and offers insight into how we as parents, youth leaders, and teachers can work together to protect them and shepherd them through this age of rapid social, emotional, and spiritual development. One caveat to Haidt’s book is that it is not written from a Christian perspective. In fact, he clearly states that he is an atheist while ironically writing an entire chapter using religious/spiritual language to describe the necessity of unplugging from the digital world.

Where do we go from here? The dangers of social media are real, but passivity isn’t an option. Here are a few simple steps you can take right away:

1. Start the conversation — Talk with your students honestly about distraction, drama, and danger online. Listen more than you lecture.
2. Set clear boundaries — Limit screen time, require devices to stay out of bedrooms at night, and model the same discipline in your own habits.
3. Replace, don’t just remove — Encourage real-world activities: family meals, face-to-face friendships, reading, serving, and worship.
4. Stay connected spiritually — Remind students often that their worth is not found in likes or followers, but in being created in God’s image and redeemed by Christ.

Social media may be designed to consume their attention, but we can equip this generation to live wisely, love deeply, and fix their eyes on what truly matters.

Let’s not just warn them about the dangers—let’s disciple them toward something better.